Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Ms. Wendy.....

What I am coming to learn about my body as I age is that I don't really know much about it. When purchasing a car or even a suit, I do more research - am more nosey than i am about my body.

It is as if I'm still expecting my mom to tell me what's going on.

I also think that I am disconnected from my body, particularily as a woman. I often feel embarassed by, ashamed of my body or others reaction to it. I'm not always graceful about how I cope.

And I have learned a lot. I have learned to honor the sacredness of my body. I honor the phases of being a woman.

I am learning that my period is not a curse or something thing to hate (it's part of God's beautiful design why would I disparage that gift). It is a time that many ancient cultures valued. They understood the power of women in this more contemplative time. This is a dreamy time. Who is more sleepy before or during? This is a time to slow down and be.

The most substantial, vulnerable element that I have to offer is represented by my choice to have when, how and with whom. As I approach menopause (I'm 43) and as I read what women describe here and other places I'm trusting in the wisdom of becoming a crone - a wise woman. I know that as my focus shifts from being a woman who was focused on my immediate family (I'm single and childless) to a bigger family (the world)I need different energy. I find that I am more pissed off and willing to use my anger to risk making things different. This is the beauty, for me, of being a wise woman who is not worried about tampons, cramps, dreaming, etc., but who is focused on being mortal and willing to be a bitch for excellence to leave a better world for my children - all children.

As for my breasts, they are symbols of nourishment and pleasure. They are designed to nourish other but for those who have breast fed you know that you cannot give nourishment unless you are first nourished. What a great metaphor for a woman's life. Now as a woman who was diagnosed with breast cancer a month ago, breasts and health now has a different focus.

So I go back to learning about, creating my own owners manual. Which means learning with is known and what alternative medical folks say about health.

Several lessons have be reignited.
1) My health and my illness are gifts from God designed to help me learn, grow, and teach (thanks Patrice for the forum).
2) I have been training for this battle for health which really is multidimensional - spirit, emotion, physical> For 10 years and as the leader of a women's leadership group, SOFIA (Society of Femininity in Action a program of the Wright Leadership Institute) that thoughtfully discusses what it means to me a woman in the world means I have more knowledge and support than most.
3) My autoimmune system is key to health - what I eat (Read Skinny Bitch an irreverent guide to changing your eating habits and the research to back it up)is critical. Visit Karyn's Raw and Cooked if you live in Chicago to taste great satisfying food that excludes meat (a sister eating raw for 30 years).
4)Changing my mind. What I think is what is so. I will be healthier one year from today than I am today and it has nothing to do with the cancer.
5)Saying what's on my mind is another key. Having support a coach a therapist with whom to be real and express fully every feeling on the rollercoaster.
6)Being a channel for God - being open to what I need to learn, to heal what I need to heal with the Mother, Father, Spirit God who gifted me with this new path so that I could more fully bring heaven to earth through my unique perspective.

If you want to learn more about Feminine Power, let me know. We're offering Saturday seminar on the topic in Chicago lead by my mentor, Judith Wright and supported by SOFIA.

Loving my body and more, Wendy

August 29, 2007 7:01 AM

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